By Kristi Casey
I used to have a terrible temper. In my senior year, I recall my friend V telling me on a near-daily basis, “Don’t let the turkeys get you
down,” as I raged about one person or another.
I hated the phrase.
“Turkeys” seemed too innocent a de- scription for the fools tormenting me.
I preferred calling the objects of my ire “twits”—a term that reminded me of my favorite English teacher. The way she would scold any lazy child caught asking terrible questions with it was a marvel. I wanted to be withering and haughty like her.
Alas, repetition makes ideas sticky.
Now, when I get wound up thinking of idiotic and cruel people wreaking havoc on the world stage, it’s V’s voice warning me about turkeys that I hear, even though I haven’t seen him in thirty years.
And, I’m (finally) beginning to think
V might have been right.
STAY FOCUSED ON YOU, NOT THE TURKEYS
You see, turkeys are vaguely ridicu- lous. I can’t get angry at them. They’re foolish birds with small minds. They can’t hurt me unless I let them.
And—most importantly—they’re not worth my time.
I learned how to tame my temper years ago. But I can still run hot, especially when I see people going out of their way to be cruel, or rewarded for being corrupt, or lying outright to cause harm and confusion.
But if all I did was rage about them,
I’d be wasting my breath on people who don’t even know I exist, and who wouldn’t care or would try to harm me if they did.
Those turkeys are a distraction that will gladly suck any joy, motivation or progress out of my life.
If I chose to keep my focus on them, I’d get stuck in a loop of anger, frustra- tion and hopelessness. Worse, I might accidentally give them more power than they deserve by giving them my energy and attention.
What a colossal waste of time. I’ve got stuff to do. And so do you. Forget those turkeys.
YOUR CHALLENGE: DON’T LET THE TURKEYS GET YOU DOWN
The next time you find yourself rag- ing about someone or something they did, take a beat. Remember, they’re just a turkey.
Say out loud to those imaginary turkeys: “I can give you love and com- passion. I can even give you ridicule, but what I cannot give you is my atten- tion. I’ve got more important things to focus on.”
Repeat, as needed.
Do something that brings you joy to rinse the sour taste of those turkeys away.
Now is a great time to distance ourselves from the constant streams of negativity pouring out of every digital channel. The turkeys want us to be over- whelmed and stressed out. The headlines, the tweeting, the horrible statements are all there to rage-bait you.
You don’t deserve that aggravation.
You deserve joy and all the good things in life. You matter.
Don’t let them weigh you down. Remember: They’re turkeys.
Practicing detachment— especially from our anger or people who trigger it—is a discipline that will help clear your mind quickly when it’s become agitated. Being able to do that is a gift.
Believe me, I know how good it feels to vent about how awful people are. I get it. But imagine how much better you’ll feel knowing that no matter what they do, they can’t hurt you because you don’t play by their rules. You’re running your own game.
Don’t let those turkeys get you down. That’s your challenge.
Let me know how it goes! Share your thoughts and experiences by writing a letter to the editor or tagging @trulykristi on social
channels.